diddlyland

message to myself

What is it about stress?  Can anyone in the corporate world ever be stress free?  For as long as I can remember, stress and worry had always motivated me to move faster, work harder, be better.  Now it just makes me lazy.  It’s turned me into an anxious, nail biter who stands still, afraid to take the next step.   What happened?  

The last couple times this happened, I just sat at my desk, staring at my screen.  Why?? Thoughts were running through my head: “Get it done now, go home early!”, “Just do it!”, “noo…This is going to take forever, it’s so tedious”, ‘I just want to sleep”. I run into these mental blocks that literally takes me days to get over. But once I get into the work mode, the stress lifts and I get more involved and alive. 

It reminds me of Bay Area traffic.  You’re sitting in a massive four or five lane parking lot wondering, “Wow, must be a bad accident up there.” ANd….nothing.  We start to move and go from 10mph back up to 60mph.  What the heck? Why was there traffic?

That happens to me.  I completely mentally shut down and won’t budge on my work.  Then all of a sudden, I go into a frenzy and wonder why I ever worried about it. STOP WORRYING! START DOING!  You know what you have to do. You know all the experts that can help.  PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER.

on another note: you made a promise to yourself to train.  go walk, warm up your legs.  get back into running. 

adding to the list

Restroom pet peeves continued…

• When people continue talking in the bathroom while you’re trying to make a drop off!! OMG, go outside and talk!  This is not a meeting room!

my sf trip

With a couple sips of my cafe sua da, I was ready to go to SF for my Laura Mercier makeup appt.  I have trouble driving in traffic and tend to get very sleepy but the super dark and thick vietnamese coffee did its job!  I didn’t even nod off or get droopy eyelids! I made it up into the city without a problem but it was another story when I got to downtown SF.  Why in the world is Mission so complicated???  It’s impossible to make a u-turn anywhere near Bloomies and it was also my first time driving to SF by myself.  I know…but I’m a SOUTH bay native lol.  Anyways, trying to make a left required 3 rights leaving me 15 minutes late.  But the valet guys were nice and the ladies were accomodating.

It was pretty cool to learn BKMs (lol) from artists (to the celebs!!) and feel like a model for a couple hours.  I left feeling great and confident. 

Which brings me to another subject.  Today was the first day I wore a dress to work and with 4 inch platforms lol.  What is it about wearing a dress that makes doors open for you?  I swear I didn’t touch a door handle today (well, except for the restroom door).  And I got a bunch of smiles, “hi” from strangers.  Why is that?  Or maybe I’m just noticing it more because I’m more self-conscious today?

Anyways..I am now a proud owner of almost $300 worth of Laura Mercier products lol.  I liked most of the stuff they used on me giving me lots of options for night/day/work/casual.  Only surprising part is the lip color that the celeb make-up artist chose for me.  It was berry red.  I mean, it’s nice but it’s not everyday for me.  It makes me look like an VCH and I NEVER EVER want to be confused for one. ugh.  The other product I wasn’t so convinced about was their “better than bare escentuals” mineral powder.  It was either that or the moisturizer they gave me that made me really shiny without as much coverage. So for now, I’m sticking to my first makeup kit - bare escentuals! 

Another thing to note: Finally drove down 280 SF to SJ to avoid the crazy 101 traffic.  This was only my second time; first time was back in high school.  I can’t believe how gorgeous the views are!  The hills were green and luscious, sky was baby blue.  The fog was starting to roll over the peaks.  Traffic was going 80+ weaving through 280.  Gorgeous. 

Alrighty, 20 minutes before we leave for the airport…wtf is Steve?   

old post

Whelp…once again.  My trip to China is delayed.  =\ My dad failed his citizenship test to get his passport and his green card only allowed him to visit Vietnam.  But good news.. .

Ladies and gentlemen, I have discovered the source of my study habits.  Apparently, my dad never, ever studied and always managed to pass his tests back in Vietnam.  For two months with me and my mom nagging him to study, he said not to worry and the citizenship test would be in Vietnamese. But finally, the night before..no wait…at 12:30 am the day of his test, he asked me to help him with a cheat sheet. 
    “Linda,” he says, “Awwno in sacramento.  What’s his name?” 
    I was confused.  “What?  Who is Awwno?”
    “AWWW NO!”
    “DAD, I DON’T KNOW AWWNO!” I yelled back. 
    “You stupid! Awwno, gubener,” he mumbled….
    “…” I gave him a blank look and it finally hit me.  LOL crazies

That night, I finally fell asleep after being exhausted from a belly ache (from laughter, if that was too vague).  =\ As it turns out, since they gave him TWO MONTHS to study for the test, it was given in English and not Vietnamese like he expected. 

Sigh…he came home late, took a long shower, fed the chickens and koi, watered the plants..very quiet. 
    “Daddy, why didn’t you study?”
    He just giggled….w.t.f. 

So, many of you ask, “How’s life at home, Jade?”

Wonderful.

quiet house

I’m sitting at home on the futon, answering emails and checking up on the news.  It’s completely quiet in the house with just the sound of clacking keys until I stopped typing and noticed other sounds.  Sigh, I totally miss this.  Being quiet and listening is, although boring to some, my favorite thing to do.  I love sitting at home with no tv and just a book.  And hopefully like today, I can hear birds chirping, a lone dove cooing, the train passing by, airplanes flying overhead…it’s beautiful!  Another favorite passtime I love is hiking with a notepad to sketch and binoculars to see the city below.  I love taking big breaths of clean, sweet air and taking pictures of tiny flowers :) 

Hiking with friends is great. You get to catch up with them and explore together.  But my favorite parts are when we take a break to drink water or just to enjoy the view.  Sometimes we’re so intent on reaching the top that we forget to pay attention to what’s around us.  I make it my job to point out the sights and make ppl stop :)  I’ll normally read up about the area and give a little history.   I know, i’m corny but it makes me happy.  I’m very lucky to have my friends join me on weekends to do this.

See you on the trails!

Restroom pet peeves

Things that annoy me when using a public restroom:

• Choosing a stall that someone just used.  (why am i always wrong?!)
• Taking my time to use a toilet seat cover only to have it fall into the toilet as I sit down..
• Not having anything to read
• Someone choosing the stall right next to me even though there are other free stalls

pretty sure i have more to add. i’ll update later.

finally got the courage to try...

…Pho with beef.  I felt a strong craving for it this morning and got a friend to go with me.  BUT, during the 2-3hr wait until lunchtime, the craving slowly died.  The urge to enjoy msg-loaded broth and some moo just plain died and got replaced by some terrible images I saw in PETA brochures.  Anyways, I said I would go so I went.   When it was time to order, all I could do was point at #47 Pho Chin Nam and then the real wait started..

Panic set in.  My heart started to pound, I’m frozen in place and trying to stop the gag-reflex.  Before I could decide to back down though, like a typical Vietnamese restaurant, my steaming bowl arrives in less than 2 minutes. lol damn. 

“Hello, my enemy, my long-lost lover.”  There it was, a one-size-only giant tub of pho with beef pieces floating around.  “I DON’T WANT IT, I DON’T WANT IT” (yea, a tiny Jade in my head was screaming.)  But dammit, I’m going to try.  So I threw all the bean sprouts, basil, etc into it, covered it up pretty well. Put a piece of meat at the bottom of my spoon and piled on the noodles.  and for color, dabbed a little Sriracha on top lol. 

I don’t really know how to describe the moment I brought the spoon to my mouth.  It’s sorta like climbing into a roller coast seat and strapping yourself in while you hear ppl screaming in the distance…but not really… So I chewed, tried to swallow, couldn’t, so I chewed some more “oh no, i can taste the meat juices! hurry swallow!!”  lol.  Yuck.  Not that great.  I thought eating meat again would bring back all the wonderful memories of bbq ribs, prime ribs, big giant holiday party pigs, kabobs, but NOPE. nothing.  It was just some weird chewy organic matter in my bowl! 

Did I finish my food?  Yea.  Did I like it? Nope.  Would I ever eat pho with beef or chicken again?  Probably not.  Does this make me want to try other meat?  I dunno. Today, I realized that I don’t need meat or care for the taste of it because when it comes down to just taste, I just prefer my soy protein and veggies.  It just feels right, tastes beter and makes me happier.  So to you meat-lovers out there, go for it. you can have my portion :) 

BTW, yay for my first real post since Xanga, Gasp!